It Was All An Act
by Tear me
Summary: "Dont fall for him ok?" His voice dripped sadness and i nearly wanted to cry. "Never" R/T
1. Id give them up for you

So heres the deal...you might have seen this beginning in one of my stories, "Again" sadly I didn't know where that fic was going, and I didn't like where it was headed, so here is a new story with a new plot. 

I hope you guys like it. 

Trory.. 

-Jen 

**August 04**

Looking down from my balcony a wave of nostalgia hit me as I spotted a couple holding hands. It stung, I'm nothing compared to that couple, I am nothing but envy. The pink lacquered sky seemed to catch my attention, and suddenly I was happy, again. It was cold out, and I'm shivering like crazy, I looked down at the couple whispering sweet nothings to each others ear. Sadness, again. The girl shivered, I wonder if shes as cold as I am, or if she was shivering because of him. He places his sweater on her, and she smiles. I frown feeling sympathetic towards them. 

"This is as good as it gets, so enjoy while it lasts." I said melodically to the air, who seemed to grab my breath eagerly. Running my fingers on the ice cold rail, I figured a walk in the park might be the remedy to my melancholy mood. I did this every day since he left, walking in the park hoping to experience happiness, but by the time I got back I felt down as ever. Then the next day I would go to the park giving it another try, still 2 years later, I hadn't given up. Pathetic, I know. But today...would be different. I Can feel it. 

As I waited at the stop light, I saw him. There he was sitting on the bench. Our bench. Our eyes seemed to lock as he mouthed "Mary." A smile over took my features. I watched as his beautiful face frowned. I glanced at the stop light reading green, mentally telling the lights to read red so I could run to him, embrace him and ask him whats wrong. To tell him how ive missed him, to feel those lips on mine. I'm happy, again. I waited anxiously for the light to turn red, blinded by my newly found happiness, it went unnoticed to me how he hadn't made the effort to stand up, to acknowledge my presence. Momentarily I snapped out of my faze, and saw him getting up glancing over his shoulder to a beautiful lady. Figures. Shattered. Sadness, again. I watched him as he kissed her, my eyes seemed to burn. 

The cars swept passed me. Suddenly I felt as If I didn't want to live anymore. I cant breathe, hes still kissing her, kill me. I stepped off the curb, and felt happy again as I felt a car hit me in that tiny second I was happy. I felt my body being flown to what I think a good 10 feet. I saw blue eyes staring at me, Tristans eyes... and I could see his lips move, but I cant hear...i blink...and blank. 

**July 01**

"Are you sure?" 

"Of course I am." His arm shifted from my shoulders, landing on my waist. Sitting on the bench on Friday afternoons was our tradition, the park was empty which seemed odd for some reason. Shifting myself so that my head was on his lap and my legs curled up against my body, I sighed in satisfaction. I looked up to see his eyes closed tightly, his brow furrowed slightly. 

"Tris." 

"mmm" 

"Theres no other way?" Hope evident in my voice. He shook his head. 

"Just promise me something, Ror." He whispered stroking my hair gently. 

"Anything." 

"Dont fall for him ok?" His voice dripped sadness, and I nearly wanted to cry. 

"Never." He lowered his head to mine, and I kissed him with all the promise I had. 

**Early July 01 **

"Rory I don't care if my father disowns me, I just want to be with you." His hand gripped the mahogany table so hard, his knuckles were turning white. 

I shifted in the leather chair, my eyes downcast not knowing what to say. It was when I glanced at the fireplace when I started to cry. 

"Tristan, for the tenth time, _I_ care If your father disowns you, What about your dreams? What about Princeton?" I sobbed making my way towards him. His finger lifted my chin, a sad smile painting his lips. 

"Rory, for the tenth time...you know I would give them up for you." I hugged him tightly, reassuring him that I knew he would. The wheels started turning in my mind, and before I knew it I was jumping up and down with glee. 

"You know, Ror, as much as It hurts me to see you cry, it hurts me more to see your enjoyment in this nasty situation." He ended looking at me oddly. 

"I have an Idea..." 

"Oh yea?" He asked, a smirk already plastered onto his gorgeous face. 

"We break up!" 

"WHAT?!" 

"I meant, lets pretend." A scratch of his head and a roll of my eyes. 

"You know I'm not that great of an actor hun, besides, my lips would be bored, and my hands would be numb. I mean the only way that would work is if we go to the extremes, which means, we would have to date other people. It should be as genuine as possible for it to work." He said animetly, his hands flying all over the place. 

"You dating. A girl." Shaking my head I repeated it several times. 

"Yes Ror, I do swing that way..." 

"Haha funny, but no. I don't want to share my Twistan." I said as would a 5 year old would. 

"Jealous now are we?" 

"How bout if I date and you don't." He didn't like that idea...but I had my _ways_ of making him agree. An hour later we were sprawled on his bed flipping pages of the yearbook finding me a new "boyfriend" 

"Aha!" He yelled pointing to Josh Adam, a junior with brown hair, and brown eyes. He was attractive id give you that, but there was no way in hell I would like him, which was a plus. I nodded, and almost laugh at how serious he was. 

"We have found our victim." I swatted his head playfully, instead he grabbed my hand and started to kiss it. I tilted my head back, eyes closed, my thoughts replaced with nothingness. I part my lips slightly, but no words comes out, i had forgotten. I always was oblivious to everything except that moment, and the moment before that, whenever he touches me like that. 

Frenchkissed fingertips now lost in his amazingly soft hair. I smile into his lips. "I Love You." My words echoed back but lower, his voice. 

Once again lips on lips. My thoughts lost again. I detach, parting him with arms length. His incredibly gorgeous blue eyes staring back at me with nothing but confusion. 

I somehow found it funny and allowed myself to laugh at this. My laughter contagious. When the laughter died down silence overtook. I smile and he turns to look at me, his own smile creeping up onto his features. 

"I had fun." I said before making my way to the door, I abruptly ran back to him planting a chaste kiss on the lips and one on his right eyelid, with that I left. 

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Ok...  
You like? Review people please! I must say that reviews are what keeps me going...they are my inspiration. so please if you like it review it. :) 

-Jen 


	2. Winter suprises

Pairing: Trory  
Disclaimer: Don't own them. 

-Jen 

**December 00**

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****The snow crunched under my shoes, the wind making my hair dance, the coldness making me clutch myself tighter. It was then that I seen him, those sapphire eyes and that shade of blonde. 

The closer I got to him, the more vivid he became. The more my smile grew wider, the more his as well. 

I stood before him taking him in. His hair grew longer, more disheveled. His eyes, so blue. That smirk, so knowing. Before I knew it my hands were around his neck, his arms around my waist, we stood there for a moment, just loving the embrace from one another. 

We were both now sitting on the bench, grinning like crazy. 

"Your hair, its longer." I said grazing one of his blonde tips. 

"You like?" I nodded.  


"Its shaggy." My fingers never leaving his hair. Grabbing my hand, he commented on how cold I was. I looked down at my attire, definitely not winter material. He understood, and gently placed his sweater on my shoulder. I raised an eyebrow. 

"What about you? You wouldn't want to freeze to death..." Laughing slightly. 

"I'll live." 

Grabbing my hand, I shivered at the touch. I hope he didn't notice. 

"Come on!" He dragged me to the middle of the park. Before I knew it, he was on his back laying on the snow, and so was I. 

"Snow angels!" He smiled, making one of his own. 

The moon was out now, the stars twinkled to their own melody. It never dawned on me, that we had spent hours just laying on the snow, looking up at the sky. 

"Its so cold." I whispered, my lips trembling slightly. 

"Do you wanna go in." His voice matching my own. 

"_No_." I said glancing at him. 

"_Me neither_." 

And we laid there like grass, for the rest of the night, grinning like crazy. 

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Review please... 


	3. Its just so weird

Ok heres the third chapter, and I hope you like it. 

Thanks for the people who read and reviewed, kisses to you.  


-Jen 

**The next day 'Dec 00**

My memory of last night was a bit blurry in the mists of being clouded with the thoughts of him. I sipped my coffee, indulging in the scene before me. The sun has just risen, creating a lavender hue amongst the sky. The birds were chirping, and it couldn't have been a better way to start a day. 

The warm fabric around me, compliments of Tristan, smelled of cologne and cigarettes. _His_ scent. I brushed off some lint on my left sleeve, liking the feel of leather against my skin. 

Walking onto the balcony just in time for a snowflake to land on my nose. It trickled down slowly, a snowflake after another. Stiffing my hands into his jacket pocket, I noticed a card, pulling it out slowly, my breath hitched in curiosity. 

It was a simple card with a silver border. His handwriting sprawled out carelessly, it read; Before I met you, I never had a clue about what I was missing, Then I found the truth in the way you're kissing me. Signed, love, Tristan. My heart skipped a beat, and I felt like I could cry. Whoever this was addressed to was a lucky woman. For all I knew, he was probably waiting for her when I came. 

I scanned my finger tips over it, reading it again, wanting the words to be forever stitched in my mind. Reminding myself momentarily, those beautiful words were not meant for me. Against my better judgment I decided to keep it, the sentimental side getting the best of me. I gingerly placed his jacket in the closet, closing the door behind me. 

He haunted me the rest of the day, his sapphire eyes replayed in my mind, the thought of which would I ever see those eyes again. 

**Mid July 01**

Pacing back in forth in the room was a bit tiring. 

"Tristan...i cant do it...its so weird." 

"Ror, you have to, for _us_." His fingers trailed against my jawline, to my hair, to the back of my neck. Crushing my lips against his, I couldn't help but wonder being close to someone else, Josh Adams to be specific. Now turned off at the imagine in my mind, the kiss came to a stop, and I resumed pacing back and forth. 

"Its just so.....weird!" 

"Really? Because I have missed the first 47 times you have said it." He said with a roll of his eyes, amusement evident in his voice. 

"Just think of the reward after, Ror, we could be together without being afraid of my father, _we could cruise along the 101 in the California sun, and stay up really late. We could buy a house in LA, raise lots of kids then we'd both join a gang, Just as long as we are together._" He ended up singing. I clapped and he bowed, thank you's lost in the laughter. 

I ended up on his bed, listening to his heartbeat while he held me in his arms. 

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"Before I met you  
I never had a clue about   
What I was missing.  
Then I found the truth in the way you're kissing me_."--- Its the first verse of the song "The Eight Day" By The June spirit. You'd be seeing more of this song throughout the story. 

_"we could cruise along the 101 in the California sun, and stay up really late_" - "1*15*96" The Ataris 

_"We could buy a house in LA, raise lots of kids then we'd both join a gang, Just as long as we are together_"- "I wont spend another night alone" The Ataris. 

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**Edit: Thanx for telling me about the error(s)...i corrected it and I hope you all forgive me :) The reason I had said it was San Dimas because the last part... "-listening to his heartbeat while he held me in his arms" was from that line in San Dimas "And I listened to your heartbeat as I held you in my arms...once again please forgive me for such a mistake...i havent listened to them in a while... and as for the rest of this story it will be up soon!**

I Hope you liked this chapter. Review!   
  



	4. I still feel you everywhere

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**Im back with an update...as for the question if I know where this fic is going, the answer is a no for I am winging it. I do hope you enjoy this as much as I am writing this. Thanks for all the great reviews, it is what keep going. Seriously. So please review...even if its just one word. **

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**About the leaps in time...im sorry for doing this, I know its confusing but bare with me. As for why they couldn't be together lets just say its the whole Romeo and Juliet situation. The Gilmores and the Dugreys are in a fight...ill leave the rest up for imagination. Sorry for not explaining this in the story, I just didn't want to. **

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**Ok loves...read on.**

**-Jen**

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**January 01**

His thumb trailed her bottom lip, so lightly she barley felt it. Barely. The tingles already present in her spine, her lip trembling at the touch. His thumb tracing her jawline in the most taunting manner, eyes locked the entire time. 

__

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_A moment ago they had been waiting for the sun to set. Both idly silent in comfort. The only noise of the tapping of his feet, and the wind rustling through the trees. She tensed, feeling his arm snake across her neck, landing on her shoulder, an innocent gesture on his part. Creating circles with his thumb, she quickly drew away as far as she could without falling off the bench. Her arm still tingling from his touch._

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_"Whats the matter?" She had failed to hear the disappointment in his voice accompanied by a sigh. Her attention now caught by the swirls of pink in the sky, gasping at its beauty, absent mindedly inching her way towards him, she rested her head on his shoulder. _

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_"I love you." His words whispered so quiet it was almost inaudible. Almost. A quick jerk of her head to face him, meeting his eyes with wide curious ones.   
_

A strand of her hair pushed behind her ear. 

"I still taste our last kiss." His voice husky, laced with intimacy. Her mind quickly thought back to that day, that day that had haunted her dreams, her thoughts, days after. That day of Madelines party, when she had found him so vulnerable, so irresistible. He kissed her, and for a moment surrendered by curiosity she kissed back. 

But this times different, her ache for his lips was much stronger, her doubts now lost in her dreadful desire. Bringing his lips to her ear the words "I still feel you everywhere" rolled off his tongue with layers of longing. The desire roaring inside of her. 

Without a moments hesitation her lips hungrily devoured his. His tongue so gentle, but so intense at the same time. That kiss _was the kiss. _That kiss washed away all her doubts. That kiss promised more to come. 

They spent the night at her place. 

**ok...ya know the drill folks! **

**R**

**E**

**V**

**I**

**E**

**W**

**kisses.**


	5. This Is The First And Last Time

**Im back with an update...a long one for that matter. Im sorry about The Ataris incident...i blame it on my lack of coffee and sleep! About the leaps of time...again, im sorry, I just find this way more interesting and new, and for those who find it confusing and annoying I hope my writing makes up for it. **

**The words in like _boldnitalic_ is from the song "Sic Transit Gloria...Glory Fades" by Brand New...Well I hope you enjoy this considering the fact that I am writing this at 3 in the morning, and for the fact that I crave reviews.**

**-Jen**

**June 02**

Her face stoic, sitting in his chair, noting how her legs delicately sprouted from underneath the lace cross legged agonizingly. He couldn't take his eyes off of her. She sat still, her eyes glued to the fireplace. Ever so slowly she turned her head, unafraid to show the tears that were decorating her porcelain cheek. Her eyes mirrored how the fire danced, roaring with rage, just like the fire that was crackling in the background mesmorizingly. 

He had to get out now. But his feet became motionless the moment she stood up. Her eyeliner painting a line from the tears she had obviously shed. Her scarlet lips too clean. Her hair was pulled up leaving her neck bare, leaving him to stare with a dry tounge. Her off the neck dress, laced at the bottom clung to her every curve, the very curves he had memorized the first time he had seen her clothed with nothing but her skin. She had swallowed, again bringing his attention to her neck. Lifting her hand up, her finger tips trailed her collarbone, the very same finger tips he had French kissed months ago. Scanning her straps with her fingers dropping to the shoulder, she did same to the second strap, in a matter of seconds the dress was on the ground. 

"Rory." He had managed to say through heavy breaths. 

He feels her tongue on his neck, flicking furiously at his flesh. Her hand pulling his head back painfully, her nails traveled down his body positively leaving red marks down his skin, stopping at his zipper. 

**_"This is so messed up."_** Barely whispered through his coarsed breathing. 

Her lips again assaulting his neck, her sucks becoming harder and harder. Scraping her teeth against his throbbing pulse her words arrived. 

"This is how much I hurt..." Scraping her teeth again, only digging deeper, she opened her mouth and bit at his flesh. His moans having no affect on her, except clenching her teeth harder. The pain pairing with something stronger. Lust and desire. 

**_He keeps his hands low, he doesn't wanna blow it. He's wet from head to toe and his eyes give her the up and the down. His stomach turns and he thinks of throwing up. But the body on the bed beckons foward and he starts growing up._**

**_"This is the first and last time," he said. She fakes a smile and presses her hips into his. He keeps his hands pinned down at his sides. _**

**_He's holding back from telling her exactly what it really feels like. He is the lamb, she is the slaughter. She's moving way too fast and all he wanted was to hold her. Nothing that he touches is really having an effect. He whispers that he loves her, but she's probably only looking for... _**

They straddle in rhythm, locking lips, locking hips. Through muffled screams in pillows she screams "I Hate You."_ But I still love you he says in his head. _She screams at the top of her lungs telling him "Faster. Faster" Their sweats fall through ruffled sheets. Both arrived. 

She squirms away, her hand clutching at the sheets around her body. He badly ached to hold her, to whisper sweet nothings into her ear. He badly ached to hear her heartbeat slow down, like how they used to, tell one another how they were good in bed, and then familiar exchanges of I love yous. But its better this way..._for now_...he reminds himself. 

He watched as she frantically searched for her clothing. Dressing openingly knowing this would make him ache more, remembering the times she would do this for him. Agonizingly slowly. He had noted every single motion she act, her hip would swing, how her leg tensed, how her hair would fall in her face when bending down to pick an article up. Never once doing this discreetingly, he had done it now. Feeling guilty for looking at her like that, _after what he had said, what he had done_. 

"I hate you." She had said, the way she had said it betrayed the words, the soft tone and the delicateness proved what she had said meant the total opposite. He felt sick. 

His body still clad in sheets laying motionless on the bed. He felt like he could throw up, and thats what he did, fumbling over his feet as how a drunk would. He was definitely drunk...drunk off of her. 

Being present in a now empty room hadn't surprised him. Running a hand through his hair he mumbled frustratingly in his hands. 

**_"This is the first and last time."_**

His words deflated into air. His words witnessed nothing but the opposite days after. 


End file.
